Says who ?
If your life was only your business you wouldn't be existing in a place with a mammoth of population.
If your life was only your business you wouldn't be questioned, judged or rated at school.
Have you ever felt that you studied something because your parents wanted you to ?
Have you ever felt that your education after a certain level was futile in terms of knowledge gained?
Well, the truth is I don't know what you feel but in the hearts of hearts I feel hollow as if the knowledge or paradigms that I had put in place for myself suddenly are drained off me. And all thanks to an education in much demand today, MBA.
A master's degree is key to some bucks in your account post completion and no bucks in your account prior to completion. Funny it is, that the same degree sounds when it comes to the big question in life - what after graduation?
Again I do not intend to blame the course but for the pedagoggy. I was murdered in the process of trying to figure out what I want out of it. (Sounds gruesome) And soon the idea of getting a job became the only comforting partner in this vicious game. All right, so it been 2 years now since I am in the job I earned post completion of an MBA. Now what ? Its the job that defines me or keeps me waiting for a glorious moment at work ?
"Do not let the work profile overshadow who you are", words of wisdom from some gurus at work who seem to have accomplished something by clinging on to their jobs. I noticed over the period of time that it was the system in which they flourished showed them path to glory. Now the point which arises here is can we assume that there are two kinds of motivations for people? One, wherein you willingly put more than 100% and find pleasure in day to day accomplishments. Second, wherein the system makes sure that whether you put in 100% or not you shall seek success. So it is the system versus you.
Going back to our discussion on education, it stands clear that if it is pursued in a great system the results are automatically great. And vice versa. So who are we kidding here? Typically ourselves, to have chosen in an hurry a certain something to put the rest of the things accomplished till then on a back-burner. Never burn your bridges, if not returning back they'd definitely be able to remind you of the hard-work it required to build them ! And that is enough for motivation when you are in doubt. But for me, every time looking back has been a short tour of falling bridges.
Some part of me contradicts saying that though the system might be strong but unless the self is strong it cannot be steered forward. Self-doubt makes you hollow. And so I feel that way. Inability to find balance between constant self-doubt or boasting of self has resulted in a messy me. Confessions my lord, but who asks for them? Again, who are we kidding ?
So does my life become mine?
Yes it does.
No matter where you take birth, your life is driven by you and you are driven by self. If you let your self be driven by the society, so it shall be an influenced life of yours. It is not possible for it to not be influenced. But, the kind of influence you draw is important. It is food for self.
Takeaway from this scribble for me is to stick to my decisions and be happy moving forward. Looking back is a thing of yesterday as for today it gives more of remorse than anything.
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